How To Get Rid of Negative And Stressful Situations
Got some stress and negativity or fear in your life? Here is the number one way to get rid of negative and stressful situations in your life.
How do I get rid of stress and negativity in my life?
Number one, choose yourself.
You cannot get rid of negative people or negative situations in your life unless you choose yourself. Unfortunately, most people have the means to change the circumstances in their life, yet they do not have the initiative to actually do it.
What that means is, saying yes to your happiness as the number one most important thing in your life.
That might mean that you have been friends with someone since elementary school and you still hang out with them all the time. They are the most dramatic, annoying, negative person where they're going nowhere in their life, but you hang out with them two days a week or one day a week. You get drinks with them every Friday.
It does nothing positive for your life, but you're like,
"But we've been friends for forever."
I'm not saying to make it this big dramatic thing. When you decide you're not going to eat cheese anymore you don't make it a dramatic thing. You're not like,
"Agghh! Goodbye to the cheese."
You don't do that with cheese! Or when you flush your goldfish down the toilet and you do a ceremony for the goldfish before. You don't do that for the goldfish! It doesn't need to be this big dramatic thing with a person in your life.
You have to say no to things that are not in the highest alignment with what you want.
As I've created more and more and more success in my life, I realized the number one contribution to the constant growth at a very steady rate has been my ability to know who I am. I know who I am and I'm not afraid to say no to things.
I saw this guy while I was walking on the beach in Hawaii recently. He's in my industry, the personal development industry, and he said,
"It's amazing how much success you've created in such a short period of time."
"You know, the thing I really admire about you is you pretty much stick to yourself and do your thing,"
And he went on to say about how his biggest problem is that he's got this overcompensation to want to socialize and be so friendly that it affects him being able to ground down and create the success that he wants.
I know who I am. I know I make a lot of these videos and all this content, but I like to be by myself though. I like to read. I like to think. I like to meditate. I like to exercise. I like to walk on the beach by myself.
I know who I am and I know what my goals are. I'm not afraid to say no to things that are not in alignment with that. You have to learn to say no to things and say,
"My happiness is my number one priority."
Say that with me.
"My happiness is my number one priority."
The subconscious mind is programmed to want approval from everyone else and all these types of things. You've got to retrain and that's why I always talk about my success hypnosis.
You can download it down below.
Make it a priority to not identify with the program. That's like, well, that's really mean, but I'm not going to be mean to not hang out with anymore.
I'm not going to say,
"Hey, I don't think you're a good person."
"It's not a matter of whether you're a good person or not. You're a great person. You just might not be in alignment with where I'm at in my life."
Don't be afraid to say that. It's not like you make it this big thing. You just say,
"Hey, I'm busy this week. I've got this new project. You know, man, I really, I really dislike my job and had been in it for five years and I'm trying to start a side business. I've been going out every Friday and Saturday night and I need to spend concentrated time on my business."
You have to choose you. You have to choose yourself and understand that through eons our brains have been programmed to be social creatures that crave validation over everything.
We've crave validation more than we crave achieving our own goals, which is bizarre.
People will get so wrapped up in what other people think of them. I don't care what you think of me. I feel like I'm a nice guy and I feel like I have a positive energy and I have a good intention in this world and if you don't like me.
A lot of people that watch my videos make negative comments and a lot of people that email our email lists make negative comments but I'm going to keep doing what I do because I know who I am and my invitation to you is to find out who you are, what you want, your values, what serves your highest happiness.
How are you at your optimal best self? What is your mission, your value, your purpose, your goals, your vision for your life?
What do you want to attract into your life?
Unapologetically say no to everything that doesn't fit into that picture because it's the only way to create it. You can't make this beautiful rose garden that used to be a weed garden unless you cut out the weeds. It's the only way you can actually do it.
If you want to get rid of stress and negativity in your life, you have to cut things out of your life. You have to unapologetically cut out a job you don't like anymore. Doesn't mean you quit tomorrow. It means you say,
"I've had enough of this bullshit. I've been sitting in this job for so long, I'm underpaid my bosses and asshole. It's really hard to even afford this apartment that I don't want. I have a crappy car. I don't like it. I want a better life and I had been settling and I want to change. So, what's my plan out of here?"
You search and develop a plan and it takes you six or twelve months or three months or eighteen months to leave the job, but you say no, say no to that job and you develop a plan to get out of it. You don't have to leave tomorrow. You develop a plan to get out of it.
That's the ultimate no. You develop a real route.
That relationship that you're in or that person that you're having sex with, but you don't really like them that much and they're kind of annoying, but you're settling. The longer you stay in that relationship, you block your real romantic relationship and you might be like,
"Well, I want to be able to have a little in and out relationship and I want the romantic aspect--"
No! You have to be able to create the space and say no to this thing or else the universe isn't going to give you something greater because you haven't created the space for it in your life. There's new friends as new romantic relationships. There's new business opportunities. There's everything that you want out there, but you have to say no to the good in order to get the great or else you're sitting there and saying,
"Why isn't the great showing up?"
But you're settling for the good. You have to set new standards for your life. You have to say,
"What is my health standard?" Is everyone I'm around very unhealthy? Why do I keep hanging out with them? Why do I keep eating what they're eating?
It doesn't mean that you don't still spend some time with them. It just means that you set new standards from your life.
Jim Rohn said,
"Walk away from the 95 percent."
Don't do it. They don't do what they do. Don't read their books. Don't watch their movies. It's not that you're better than them. It's that you're making the choice that you don't want your last five years to be like your next five years.
When you unapologetically say,
"I am important! Finally, I am important!"
Society wants you to believe you're not important. It wants you to believe that the ultimate priorities are upholding the social tribe, cultural norms and values.
No! Number one importance is me, my happiness, my joy. When I'm happy and I'm joyful, I can give the best positive energy to everyone around. I can make the world a better place, a more exciting and inspiring place because I'm excited, inspired and happy to my highest levels. I'm not settling any more, and that's what I invite you to do.
When you do that, you'll notice stress and anxiety and worrying. A lot of those things are gone. It's unapologetic-ally saying,
"I deserve more."
You may not believe that you can create all the things that you want, but you better believe you deserve it because no one else is going to create it for you.
This is Jake Ducey with JakeDucey.com.
Download my free success hypnosis down below,
Re-program your subconscious mind for success for abundance. Get rid of all the negativity from our society. Say goodbye to it and reprogram yourself.
Brainwash yourself before the world brainwashes you.
Have a beautiful, awesome day. Until next time. Be sure to comment your questions below. I'll answer them on the Ask Jake Show.
Jake Ducey is a two-time published author with Penguin/Random-House (The Purpose Principles and Profit From Happiness), a leading speaker for his generation having been featured in TEDx Youth, hired by mega organizations such as Nielsen and Accenture, and a leader who has already inspired countless thousands of young people to seek meaningful career success and to make a difference in the world.